Jason Lewis and friends - Geller Report photo
by Steve Timmer
May 10, 2020, 7:30 PM

Pandemicus limeratica

I haven’t written much here lately, but I have occupied some of my time writing limericks on the day’s news which I’ve published on Twitter. Perhaps you’ve seen some of them there, but all of them, together with the news stories that inspired each one, are in a profile thread on Twitter. Here are some of my favorites.

One the occasion of the first “open ‘er up” rally at the Governor’s mansion.

The status quo ante the virus,
The mob thought clearly desirous,
…But their braying and coughing
…Sent virus drops sloughing,
And marked a few there expirous.

An observation on the importance of social distancing at the time of the same event.

The siege of virus corona
Is leaving us feeling alona,
…Keep your distance, however,
…Whatever the weather,
Or you’ll be on your own in a coma.

Jason Lewis was at the rally, posing for selfies with the crowd.

Consider the loudmouth, the JLew,
His appeal to some voters, the yahoo,
…He rubs shoulders with them,
…They don’t know where he’s been,
It’s a corona convention impromptu.

On Minnesota Senator Majority Leader Gazelka’s opposition to the governor’s stay at home order.

Gazella’s a helluva fella,
His friends would certainly tell ya,
…But his virus advice
…Puts more humans on ice,
We’ll store them all in his cellar.

Donald Trump’s first appearance in the thread.

Donnie, the King of Corona,
As usual, is full of bologna,
…He can’t tell it straight
…And thinks he’s so great,
We can’t wait ‘til fall to dethrona.

Donald Trump muses about using disinfectant on humans to kill the virus.

The makers of Lysol and Clorox
Eschew their use as a detox,
…But by serious brain quirk,
…Dr. Trump thinks they’ll work,
And Dr. Birx cries out, “It’s a crox!”

Majority Leader Gazelka uses the pandemic as an excuse to cut wages to state employees.

Gazella’s a helluva fella,
His friends would certainly tell ya,
…But not to the workers,
…He’s thinks they’re all shirkers,
And down the river he’d sella.

The president, countering reports of his sloth.

The President’s a beautiful worker,
Who eschews his favorite burger, (cheese)
…To keep us all free
…From the Fake News debris,
But it’s a fib to the casual observer.

Probably my favorite of all, on reports that the White House was bringing back former communications person Hope Hicks.

The President calls on Hope Hicks
To try to improve Donald’s shticks.
…It’s a pretty big task,
…Almost too much to ask,
Donald’s boat is too leaky to fix.

President Trump disclaimed several time responsibility for the calamity.

The prez in self-pity does wallow,
His excuses? Exceedingly hollow,
…“I don’t take the blame,”
…Though the virus’s aflame,
He pouts as he sits in the guano.

That’s enough for now. More later.



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