by Steve Timmer

Apr 4, 2023, 12:30 PM

An Hour to Cuba in a Cigarette Boat

Or Trump’s Stormy Blues

It was all about the banging of Stormy,
I’m usually limp but she made me horny,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

At first she said no, but I’m really pushy,
All I wanted was a little side nooky,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

I pulled down my shorts; she laughed at my member,
And said it would be really hard to remember,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

   But, oh god, she really remembered,
   She really remembered, she did.

I was done in a flash; she was under-impressed,
She laughed and said I’d better get dressed,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

I thought I was done with her after that,
But it wasn’t long after she promised to rat.
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

I said to Mikey my long faithful fixer,
Let’s track her down and prepare an elixir,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

   But, oh god, she really remembered,
   She really remembered, she did.

But Mikey said, “I won’t make her dead,
“How ‘bout if we offer some money instead?”
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

Mikey even offered to carry the loot,
To make the business quite over and moot,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

But Mikey and Stormy both ratted to Alvin,
And now I’m facing the New York hangman,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

   But, oh god, she really remembered,
   She really remembered, she did.

Alvin’s not the end of my trouble,
Every week it seems the peril is double,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

I talked to my friend, the sycophant Tucker,
He said, you leave now, or you’ll be a sucker,
An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette Boat.

I can’t see a way to get out of this fix,
I’ve tried and I’ve tried and I’m all out of tricks,
I’m going to Cuba in a Cigarette boat.

An hour to Cuba in a Cigarette boat . . .